first things first i’m
- baby: d... d... d...
- father: ...dad? omg you are going to say dad as your first word!!!
- baby: d... dONT WANNA BE AN AMERICAN IDIOT
- baby: *guitar sounds from baby's mouth*
I’m sorry I can’t come to the phone right now. I’m busy cutting open Fruit Gushers and squeezing all of the goo into a glass so I can take a shot of it because that has always been a dream of mine and now that I’m an adult with a job, I finally have the means to make it a reality. Please leave your name and number after the beep.